*Timesheets due July 3rd.
*Halfhearted "Happy Fourth!" to jerkoffs leaving office at 2:00 p.m. on July 2nd.
*Contemplating alternate world where United States never gained independence from England, and how fulfilling and cool our alternate British careers probably would have been.
*Increase in white paper, red and blue pen use.
*Delighting coworkers by performing Stars & Stripes Forever cymbal crashes at random moments throughout week.
*Hot dog eating contest alone in car, just like last Wednesday.
*Setting off Roman Candle. Somewhere. You'll see.
